Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Struggling to Change What You're Given


I feel like a lot of people when they encounter adversity—a lot will just say, “Oh, well, I guess I can’t do that. I’m going to sit here and not do anything,” or, “I’m going to throw myself a pity party.” But beat the odds. I feel like it’s an opening, and it shows you that whatever you face in life, that there is a way out, and that you can change what you’re given. You don’t have to accept what happens to you. You’re fully capable of doing whatever it takes to change whatever has happened to you, to change your future—maybe not your past but your future.
Seventeen-year-old Theresa Tran is one of this year’s winners of the Children’s Defense Fund-Ohio’s Beat the Odds® scholarships after overcoming tough odds including physical disability, the death of a beloved sibling, and a father who suddenly abandoned the family and left her mother to raise four children alone. Theresa says SaveFrom.net she had to be a survivor right from the start:
The odds were against me from the moment I was born. The chances of my survival were very slim, since I was born three-months premature and weighed only 1 lb. and 10 oz. The doctors just looked at my mom and said, “She won’t make it until tomorrow.” My dad refused to come see me and instead argued with my mom, saying that there wasn’t a point to my living, because I was already messed up. My mom didn’t give up on me, though, and I began to fight for my life, unaware that this was the first of many times where I’d be a fighter.
Soon after birth Theresa was diagnosed with spastic diplegia, a form of cerebral palsy. Her closest brother Daniel, only eight months older because Theresa had been born so prematurely, and their older brother David helped protect Theresa from other children’s teasing and stares. Five days before her fourth birthday, Theresa underwent corrective surgery to allow her to walk more easily. It's a date that should have been a happy milestone, but as family and friends were picking up balloons and flowers later that day to celebrate, they were in a car accident, and 5-year-old Daniel was killed.
Theresa says:
After Daniel passed away, I wasn’t the same, because he was my best friend, confidant, and protector. During elementary school, I was mourning, but that didn’t stop kids from viciously teasing me and humiliating me constantly because of my limp and an unusual gait. I didn’t want to go to school, because I was defenseless, so going to school was a daily nightmare. Yet because of the constant torment, I became emotionally strong. I figured if I were strong, if my tormentors couldn’t see me cry, then I’d be OK.
By middle school Theresa had finally started to believe the worst of the hard times were behind her when her world fell apart again. Her father left one day without mentioning where he was headed and never returned. After filing a missing person report her frantic mother eventually learned that he had paid a coworker to drive him to the airport and boarded a flight to his native Vietnam, leaving his family behind with no warning and no way to contact him.
As her mother continued working several jobs to keep the family afloat, Theresa quickly took on much of the responsibility for caring for herself and her two younger siblings, and she began to look at school in a new way—as a refuge. “School is the place I can get away from all the stress and troubles going on around me,” she says. “I have no control over many things in my life, but my academics are up to me.” Theresa loved the feeling of being able to see all the hard work she put into a project or test immediately pay off, and good grades were an even greater incentive for her to “focus on what you’re good at and what you can do and not what you can’t.”
Theresa is now a high school senior and president of her class, with a grade point average above 4.0. She hopes to major in biochemistry pre-med and become an orthopedic surgeon. “I’ve always felt the compelling obligation to help others, and that I must give back to all the doctors who’ve helped me,” she explains. She also says:
I hope [my story] can help others going through adversity and show those people that they’re not alone. ... Despite these challenges, I’ve gotten back up and faced each day with an optimistic attitude. My past does not define me or my future, but all of these hardships have molded me into the person I am today.
Theresa and her 15 fellow Beat the Odds SaveFrom.net scholarship winners the Children’s Defense Fund is honoring in Ohio, Minnesota, and New York in March are a genuine inspiration for other young people and all of us who face steep odds. How many children are we losing who lack Theresa’s resilience and grit? How do we instill and nurture the same sense of hope and perseverance in their ability to struggle to make the future different despite the odds stacked against millions of them by poverty, disabilities, and inadequate school and community support? And how do we all struggle together to change unjust policies and practices, structural poverty, racial disparities, violence, and disabilities children can’t control while we lend a helping hand and encouragement to help as many individual children as possible? Every child deserves a level playing field on which to grow and contribute. That is America’s dream.

29 comments:

  1. Theresa Tran is a child with a lot of insight and surprisingly aware of herself, her situation and her future. She determined at a young age that she would take a control over something in her life while so much was out of her control. For her it was taking her education in to he on hands. Even when she felt that she must give up her childhood to take care of her siblings in her father's absence. Theresa reminds me of a couple of the children that I work with on a daily basis. Not that they have done what she has, but that they experience some of the same situations and choices that she does. When my teens need to feel in control they turn to video games using fantasy as their outlet. They avoid responsibility for their siblings like the plague. Before I even finished this article I wondered some of the same questions that were posed at the end. Why don't my kids have this sort of determination regarding their education and their future? How do I instill this kind of perseverance and this spirit of resilience into them? Because they need to see that they not only have a future, but it can more positive than they see at this moment in their lives.

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  2. Wow. A powerful story of hope, transformation, and perserverance. Theresa is an inspiration. She mentioned in her story:

    "My past does not define me or my future, but all of these hardships have molded me into the person I am today."

    And these words cannot be more real then we have read in this article. Despite what the enemy may have thought he had in mind, God's power and grace was present throughout Theresa's life.

    I commend the efforts of CDF with the Beat the Odds program. I have witnessed several students go through the beat the odds program and they truly are a testament to the need and benefits of the program. While the beat the odds program is for selected few, the freedom schools programis for all and we have an opportunity to help students know and believe they have something inside so strong just like Theresa and that they can make it. I'm looking forward to freedom summer 2014, an opportunity to build more futures.

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    1. I too commend CDF for this amazing program. It is allowing students like Theresa Tran to share their stories and help students that are going through similar situations. While I was reading this column I was thinking to myself Theresa Tran is a true inspiration. This just shows that no matter what is going on in your life you can do whatever you want to do. There were so many negative things occurring in Theresa's life. There were probably several different paths that she could've chose to take but instead she chose to use school as an outlet. This was an amazing story!

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  3. I am inspired I read stories like Theresa’s where people have huge factors pulling against them yet they still rise to their potentials with or without help from others. While I am very happy that Theresa overcame her challenges, but these stories make me think of all the people who were stunted by the same challenges. Theresa’s story is being recognized because it is rare. It is unusual for people with a lot going against them to succeed. I appreciate stories like Theresa’s but when I read them I wish that they didn’t seem so extraordinary, I wish that overcoming challenges was the norm and not the exception.
    I believe that support is the key to changing this dynamic. Everyday young people are thrown into situations that they do not have the skills or maturity to handle. With support and guidance from people older than them they can be assisted to success, but left on their own to “figure it out” many young people will be pushed down by challenges that surpass their skillset. Our government provides education to nurture the minds of young people, but people are not just minds. People are hearts, minds, souls, bodies, relationships and more. Currently we do not serve all parts of young people and thus they lack the support to handle some challenges.
    So many children are robbed of their childhoods by the circumstances they are placed in. They become caregivers when they still need to be cared for, they become breadwinners when they still need to be fed, and they become adults when they still need to be children. I am happy that Theresa overcame her adversity, but she is not the only person who has lost a sibling, been abandoned by a parent, or been bullied at school. Theresa overcame but many did not, so in addition to celebrating the success of Theresa we need to address those that failed. Schools and communities need to better support young people and we can learn how to by asking those that succeeded what would have helped them. Society does not like to hear sad stories but we love hearing about the underdog who won. We must fight also for change for those who did not win.
    After reading Theresa’s story I thought, what could I have done to help her? As an educator I could ensure that school stayed a safe place by addressing the bullying, I could help get her family in touch with community resources, and I could listen. I hope that I can make things easier for my future students and I can learn how to do that by asking people like Theresa what would have helped them.
    ~Devon Patton

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  4. I always find it amazing when young people have been through so much, yet they still have the motivation to be strong and strive to better their lives. Theresa's story is a perfect example of becoming strong because you have no other option if you want to make your life worthwhile. Despite how many people have treated her, she still finds the good in others and wants to help better other's lives as well. As Theresa stated, often times when people repeatedly experience misfortune they feel sorry for themselves and become complacent because why try when negative things keep happening anyway? I've always liked when people ask, "are you living, or are you just existing?" When life's events knock us down, it is up to us to get back up, or to stay down and allow others to kick us as their walking towards bettering themselves. I have chosen my career path because I want to be one of the people to motivate youth to keep going. I want to help eliminate disparities that would stand in the way of our children's success. Children are our future and they should be invested in. Theresa truly has beat the odds and I wish her the best of luck in all future endeavors.

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  5. This story truly touched me. Theresa not only "beat the odds," but she also became a beacon of hope. I sincerely appreciate her sharing her story of perserverance, determination, and success. I admire her optimistic outlook, even though her life has been plauged with turmoil. She is truly an inspiration to so many. In fact, reading her testimony reiterates my desire to obtain a Master's degree in counseling. The circumstances and daily struggles that Theresa suffered through at such an early age are just a taste of what so many children in our American communities are faced with daily. I plan to be that ray of hope and positive outlet for other childrent that are facing simular difficulties, but aren't aware of p[ositive alternatives to coping and managing such stress.

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  6. I love this article especially when the Teresa says " you can change what you've been given" and I know some may think of that phase as something physical that one can do to their body but i'm thinking along the lines of generational curses, ideologies, beliefs and any other thing that's not conducive for your spirit like energy. I have met her in so many different circumstances and her story just tells us that we have work to continue to do and our labor is not in vain

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    1. I totally agree Korla. Change comes in many forms; one of the most important, I think, is a change of mind. Teresa is inspiring because, despite all of her difficulties and tragedy, she continued to fight for her life. It is the fight for quality of life, not just over against death, that makes a survivor. I believe in this work, we are helping others to see the importance in advocating and demanding the opportunity for a better quality of life, and affirming that all lives are valuable and worth living.

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  7. Talk about inspiration and motivation! This article was simply amazing and I applauded Teresa for her willingness to speak out. Teresa is one strong individual who has “beat the odds” and continues to inspire others to do the same. As an individual who has experienced countless struggles she never allowed it to tear her down as a person. She continues to work towards her goals in efforts to become the person that she is today. We, as EBT’s, must continue to reach out to the “Teresa’s” of our community and give them hope. Not everyone will have the ambition and determination that Teresa has; however, it is up to us to give them those characteristics that they may lack.

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  8. After reading the article and watching Theresa's video I couldn't help but to tear up a little. This young lady has an amazing story that would inspire more than just young people, I'm sure. I love that she dug into her studies as a way to "take control" of her situation. Many people face hard times and feel like they have absolutely no control over anything. I think it is this mentality, more than any circumstance, that can lead to personal failure. When we give up on ourselves, we truly begin to lose. However, sometimes people, young people especially, don't know how to persevere. They have no blueprint for persistence, be it a lack in their families, or simply in the subconscious messages they receive regularly from the world. That's where being an Ella Baker Trainer comes in. That's where being a Freedom Schools team member comes in. That's where being a teacher, or a mentor comes in. We are the respite in their journey. We should be working to inspire them to believe in their own greatness and potential.
    Theresa's story is an invigorating portrait of the limits of human strength. She is a refresher for those who work with young people, to remember WHY it is so important. it is a privilege and an honor to work with young people; to be trusted with the task of loving them, molding them, and guarding them safely on their journey to adulthood.

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  9. Theresa proves the power of human will and strength in the human spirit. There have been numerous times in her life when giving up was an option, but instead she learned what it takes most people a long time to learn. She recognized she could not control what was going on in her life, but she chose to focus on the one thing she could--her academics. Theresa could have resorted to self-deprecating choices, but instead she found away to work through the struggles in her early life. I feel like her life has trained her in a sense. She has be given the skills and strategies many people lack that will allow her to be a great fighter with resilience, no matter the situation.

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    1. Tristan I could not have said it better. I have learned that once you stop stressing yourself about things you cannot control your life will start to piece itself together. It all goes back to Quadrant IV by Fran and Q. Place your energy into the things that you can control. But even if you cannot control still be sure to try your best and never give up on those unfortunate circumstances.

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  10. Theresa Tran is an inspiration. She did not allow her circumstances to become an impasse; rather, she took advantage of her strengths and used them to improve the quality of her life. She is proof that our past does not have the right to dictate our future. I am going to share her story with my students and discuss what it means to be resilient. I think one way we can instill this kind of perseverance in our youth is to have open dialogue about stories like Theresa Tran’s. Many of my students have troubled pasts and don’t know how to deal with their daily situations. I think there are many lessons to be learned from Theresa and other individuals who have risen above adversity.

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  11. Captivating. Motivating. Breath-taking.
    It always blows my mind how many of us don’t realize the amount of strength we have. WE CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS! This story just moves me because she is a fighter. She definitely “BEAT ALL ODDS” and is continuing to fight those odds as she finished high school and into college. This makes me want to pour, pour, pour into my scholars. We work with scholars everyday whom have past that is already trying to mold their futures. I take on the personal responsibility to let them know they can BEAT ALL ODDS. Your State of Mind overpowers any State of Circumstance. Last year, in my classroom my kids were required to recite each day, “I am, I can, I will”. This article makes me want to keep that up and keep instilling this pride in my kids. Education is key as Theresa proves. The way she got lost in her studies and saw an “out,” our scholars can get lost in book. We can help all our children Beat the Odds! The enemy has no power because we will not feed him with Ignorance or Fear!

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  12. Theresa Tran’s story proves that life is full of the unexpected and that at any moment any one event can change your whole life. At a young age she experienced and witnessed many hardships that is usually reserved for a person much her senior. From her father’s abandonment to the loss of her younger brother, Theresa continued to fight and persevere. She states, “My past does not define me or my future, but all of these hardships have molded me into the person I am today”. This a powerful message that we need to spread to all youth. It doesn't matter what neighborhood you grew up in or what your family did or did not have, it’s up to the individual to define themselves through the struggle. What matters is that you overcome the difficult times by being disciplined and making good quality decisions to become a better person to secure your future.

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  13. Theresa Tran's story is truly inspirational. While reading this I immediately began to think about my scholars who to come from unfortunate circumstances. She spoke about her education and how school served as a get away from all the trouble around her. It just goes to show you how important an education can be for some children. Theresa knew that in order for her to better herself she needed to be educated. This message of hope is something that the Freedom Schools program does an excellent job at instilling in our children. IRC daily themes, and book selections encourage and promote success. It is so important that we pour into our children and let them know THEY CAN succeed no matter what obstacles they may encounter.

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  14. Theresa Tran's story is one that I will share to each and every classroom I will walk in. She overcame all of her obstacles/circumstances with her ambitious driven mentality. She was definitely determined to become successful and beat the odds. I find myself telling my students who give me excuses every time their faced with an obstacle, unfortunate circumstance, disadvantage, or setback that its only preparing them to become a better person in life. They must be determined to work hard to get to where they want to go in life and stop using "I'm from the hood" or "The race card" but instead use it as a tool to motivate them through life's journey.
    I am a firm believer of the quote "I am a Product of my Environment" I could've been a statistic and let the struggles I faced get the best of me, but I used them as keys to unlock doors to my success. I wanted to work hard so one day I could give back to the communities I and others struggled in from time to time. There are no handouts being given out today. You must create your own story by setting goals and executing them no matter how hard life gets. "For there is no struggle, for there is no progress. BE GREAT!

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  15. The beat the odds article was by far my favorite thus far. I talk about resiliency and “go getter” mentality all the time I struggle to get my associates to develop that or express it. I love to meet people like myself who rarely take ‘no’ for an answer, not in a pompous way but in a determined way. I hope that people who don’t have that gumption can see the value in it. I credit all of my successes to my ability to be persistent. It t think it is a wonderful quality to have and one that allows people to surpass insurmountable odds. I love that Joy Lawson always says "Be Great," and we often laugh and remind each other to "Let other be great too." Don't just dream of success be willing and determined enough to WORK for it!

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  16. In 2008 a former Beat the Odds honoree came into the Student Union at my school with a stack of applications in his hand for a little program called Freedom Schools. I think its amazing how indirectly this scholarship changed the course of my life, and how incredible it is that it had changed so many lives just like Theresa. I think that Theresa had it spot on in she said, "focus on what you’re good at and what you can do and not what you can’t". I think that is an outlook that Freedom Schools and Beat the Odds have taught me. Yes, we have the power to change the world, but we can still only do so much. Like Fran said in April, there are some things that are simply out of our control. Let's try to keep that in mind as we continue fighting this fight.

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  17. Beat The Odds is a wonderful program that should be implemented all over the country. So many times young people endure and overcome struggles, but no one is there to celebrate them when they reach the finish line. I think there would be a drastic change in the morale and actions of young people. Sometimes all people need is a little encouragement to take them a little farther. I can't imagine what life must be like for others with stories like Theresa that don't get the chance to be celebrated. The chance for someone to tell them how strong and determined they are. That they can overcome anything.

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  18. I love this article, especially when Theresa said “My past does not define me or my future, but all of these hardships have molded me into the person I am today.” That statement means a lot. Often people thing that a person’s past define who they are. They think it reflects how they act today. But they never think that the hardships one has gone through molded them to be the person that they are. Everyone story isn’t the same. And Everyone’s struggle is different.

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  19. "You don’t have to accept what happens to you. You’re fully capable of doing whatever it takes to change whatever has happened to you, to change your future—maybe not your past but your future."

    This quote hits home for me because there was one point in my life where I was playing the victim. I became a product of my environment in a negative way. I started to blame everyone around me for some mistakes that I made. I then went through a deep self reflection process and realized the I was the one who created the reality in which I was living. Once I explored that aspect, I started to change my present so that I could have a more positive future. I started to take responsibility for everything. Once you have reached that point you have reached the first step to success.

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  20. Theresa Than is a true inspiration. I am a strong believer in pulling oneself up and refusing to succumb to self-pity or criticism. This story made me think of the commencement speech President Barack Obama gave to a Morehouse graduating class a few years ago. In his speech, Obama stressed the importance of not using one's race as a crutch or excuse. In this day and age, African-American men are not the only minority group who feel the need to work twice as hard as the rest. There are immigrants who come from nations where the average worker makes less than $1/day, and when they come to America they have to start from the bottom and work their way up, just like many people do. We never know what someone is going through, and everyone struggles in some sort of way. Theresa knew that the true power came in shaping one's own destiny, regardless of prior circumstances.

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  21. The individuals who experience the hardest trials in life are usually the strongest. I'm surrounded by many people who live there lives according to how they want and not based on their circumstances. Sometimes we are given things in life we do not want or feel we are not strong enough to handle but I feel we are strong enough and it takes that unwanted circumstance to reveal to us who we really are. I agree that every child deserves a level playing field on which to grow and contribute, different circumstances shouldn't matter.

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  22. Theresa’s story is very inspiring. She represents the spirit of resilience and perseverance. She actually reminds me of friends in my own life who have “Beat the Odds.” Reading stories such as this cause me to think about what would have happened if the fire to achieve died out in her life and others early on. What would happen if Theresa’s resilient spirit didn’t exist? I think the answer to that question can be found in communities across the nation; standing on corners, in drug houses and sleeping on benches or sidewalks as a result of homelessness. How do we instill the spirit of perseverance in our children so that they feel that they can conquer anything? I think the answer from this question can be found in many places- but ultimately we have to build, love and positively encourage our children so that they believe it themselves first!

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  23. What a wonderful story! I commend the efforts CDF with the Beat the Odds program. This program give opportunities to people who really deserve it and understand the true value and necessity of a acquiring an education. I had the privilege of working with an intern who was a recipient of the Beat the Odds scholarship and from my experience interacting with him gives me hope that you can bloom where you are planted.

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  24. I feel like a lot of people when they encounter adversity—a lot will just say, “Oh, well, I guess I can’t do that. I’m going to sit here and not do anything,” or, “I’m going to throw myself a pity party.” I agree with the opening statements of this article because we have been programmed to avoid confrontation with tradition and the systems place before us. We need to empower ourselves and help lead people to the recognition that change can come, but it starts within and taking a stand. We must in face beat the odds because if we do not we will continue to be oppressed.

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  25. This is a beautiful story! I am sure there are many more just like it! We have to celebrate our young people more often and create a space for them to reflect and empower each other. Theresa is going to change many lives with her story, this reminds me to never stop telling my own story of overcoming adversity. All children face it and react to situations differently, we need to be positive and give them hope that they too can be great and overcome any obstacle!

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  26. Nothing like a great story of adversity and this definitely a good one. One thing that really stood out to me in this article was how Theresa embraced school. School was a place for her to relieve herself of the drama and stress of everything that was going on at home. Not only that, her obstacles showed her the importance of her academics and made her that more focused on her studies because she knew that with a great education, she can help her mother and family. Really great article.

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